Dream 6/18/2016

I was touring the batcave with Greg. Sort of.

Batman was wearing the getup of the serious batman (nolan batman or burton batman), but was jovial, like adam west / 60s camp batman.

We stayed the night in the loft of a home that was part of the cave, maybe? The loft was dark, had no furniture. It may have had a single light bulb on an extension cord hanging from the ceiling. We slept in sleeping bags. It reminded me a lot of the place we slept in a cave overnight as part of a camping trip when Shawn was in boy scouts.

However, it was not derelict. It was well cared-for and maintained. Maybe a little dusty, but that's it.

The feeling was very boring / blaze / we're just on a kind of everyday tourist excursion. Greg and I were kind of playing around and laughing together, making casual jokes. I remember putting my arm through his and holding his hand and casually following along the guided tour of the batcave that batman was giving.

Dream the night of 2/13/16

I was moving into a new place to live. It was an interesting older home. I had a pet bird that I had forgotten about. The cage was discovered piled up behind boxes and other things that were just moved from our old home. I pulled the cockatiel out of the cage, but it wouldn't perch on my finger, I just had to hold it, as it was clearly dying.

It morphed into a docile pet rat. I was delighted to remember my now full cage of pet rats. They were varying sizes and were colored like guinea pigs. A tiny white one with large black spots, a very large (cat sized) dark brown one, a black, peanut butter, and white one (like Guinea was). And a few more.

I had two cages that I moved them into in the new home. Both cages were thick black wire, but standard wiring for a rodent pet cage (it had just a few decorate elements, as they tend to). There were several doors on both cages, but each door was a square of thick Plexiglas that slid into place to close the opening. I had to rush to close each one as all the rats kept escaping. I was laughing and enjoying myself as I found and returned each escapee back to his or her cage only to find another one escaping out of an open door that I didn't notice before.

Finally, all were secure except for the large cat-sized brown rat. I grabbed him (her?) in my arms and held him like I originally held the bird and like I usually hold Jennie, like an infant cradled in my arms. I wasn't sure if the creature was okay at first, but then I was overcome with maternal feelings and soon, the rat turned into a baby.

The baby's complexion switched rapidly, as if my mind couldn't make a final decision. It didn't matter, and in the dream I knew it didn't matter. I was still wrapped in joy and love for this child. I cradled him or her and showered him with kisses. It was a boy. He grew to baby-size and I held him out in front of me and swirled around in joy, laughing and chirping at him with coos.

The baby was confused, and ultimately non-responsive, as though it were a doll coming to life. Just as it began looking around and identifying its surroundings, I made a comment to the both of us that we were going to find Greg to share this joy.

broken highway

Just a few notes for myself later -

Kate Beaton had a food-truck style truck that was selling art / her books at a craft fair.

Setting: The dessert, out in the middle of nowhere. Just a lone, passing highway, but for some reason there was an overpass and this fair took place under the overpass.

When I left, the highway extended into the sky (the highway didn't move, this was the normal state of the highway, I just drove up it). I was driving on a very scaled down / bare bones motorcycle, like a honda.

As I drove up the highway, it just seemed to get taller and steeper. Then, I noticed that the highway was splitting apart and had large swaths that were missing. I avoided them and kept going until I got to a point where it was completely broken through, but with random parts in the middle of the hole still there, but with nothing was holding them up. As if the image of the highway itself was crumbling/cracking. Just beyond this point was the crux/climax/crest of the hill. I was almost over it!

I got off the motorcycle, because it was too steep at this point to stay on the cycle without falling backwards. I crawled to the edge. I was myself in this dream, but another me appeared, standing on the opposite side of the crack, urging me to jump - that I could make the jump without falling. She kneeled down, seemingly unhindered by the steepness, while I was now struggling to hold on to stay upright (litterally gripping the surface of the road).

The other me kneeled down and reached out her hand to try and urged me to reach out and jump and grab her hand.

I tried. I didn't try very hard. It was like that feeling of running in a dream, where you give it your all, but you still can't run very far. The jump was like nothing. I glimpsed her face and she was dissappointed as she watched me fall. Mostly pity, though.

I fell and fell and fell, but fell slowly and softly, and hit the desert ground below with a soft thud. I got up and dusted myself off, surveyed myself for injuries, then when I was satisfied that I was okay, I looked around at the desert view around me.

I was sad that I didn't have my motorcycle anymore and the highway was now a long walk off.

"Here we go again!"

I find it funny reading over these old, old passages. My writing style is ALMOST entertaining - just a bit off somehow. It needs a good peer review or two I suppose. Part of the problem is my poor grasp of grammar in the sense of interesting sentence structure. It's all sentences spliced together with , and , but , or, etc. etc. etc. Also, I can't start a sentence with anything but I, He, She, It, SUBJECT.

Anyway. (My favorite blogging word). I had a strange dream last night about the Man from La Mancha.

I was attending a very near-futuristic university, though I don't recall if I was a teacher or student or visiting. I was milling about at the end of a tour and I ran into Don. I was awe-struck and excited that he was there. But there was also a very peculiar feeling I had for him, and I sensed he felt the same way towards me, despite his psychosis. Eventually we both knew what it was - a strange and random strike from cupid's arrow. This wasn't love though, it was some sort of swooning attraction for one another, purely biological but without that whole lust thing.

I was myself in this dream so I thought of Greg. As Don and I ran about looking for somewhere to be alone, I began rationalizing the cheating: "I know this attraction is not love, this attraction is something else entirely. Therefore it is not cheating if I have sex with Don." Of course this made absolutely perfect sense. Until Don and I found ourselves alone and things began to progress. I then thought, "what if the sex with Don is so amazing, I can't stop? Is it okay to keep having sex with Don while with Greg? Would that be cheating?" I think I eventually rationalized it out to where I could do it without consequences, but deep down - somewhere below the powerful emotions I knew Greg wouldn't see it the same way. (haha, I would think not!)

Naturally the dream ended before any of the real fun got on between Don and I, though I'm a bit glad as that would have made this my second-only sex dream. First with Drew Carey, then with Don Quijote...SO LAME. Nope, no amazing muscle men for me, Drew Carey and Don fucking Quijote.

But GOD DAMN, that feeling of attraction was amazing. I can't even describe it. It didn't feel like love, it didn't feel like lust. It was somewhere in between.

Lady lucidity is just teasing me now

So I had another lucid tease during a nap yesterday.  I only remember glimpses of the dreams, but
I distinctly remember getting that feeling of "this is too real," as the world in my dream started raining.  
I felt the raindrops falling on me and the cool breeze flowing around me.  Just as I became fully lucid, 
as I had felt in my previous actual lucid dream, I felt myself waking up.  I starting trying to claw my 
way back into the dream.  I felt my arms reaching out for something, but instead of the dream world 
I felt the sheets of my bed.  I started clawing at the sheets and became stuck between worlds as the 
sheets materialized before me in my dream state, allowing me to fall into them trying to break through 
back into my dreams instead of waking up.  They had become like a physical barrier as well as a 
metaphorical mental block that did not allow me to pass back over.

It was actually kind of cool in hindsight, but really really frustrating at the time. 

A bit of lucidity

I'm doing better at remembering my dreams again lately, and last night it paid off for just a moment or two. I don't remember the time of night, but I was walking about in a dream and I woke myself up halfway because I could hear myself talking out loud and I felt as if my arms were flailing about (depending on what I was doing in the dream prior to that point).

I realized I was in a dream as I walked around this corner of a doorway and saw someone sort of opening a fridge and getting something out of it. The image froze and I could feel myself waking up, so I forced myself as best I could to stay dreaming. The image of the person getting into the fridge changed to simply the person (I think it was my brother) standing there, staring blankly into space. I wasn't sure what to do at this point since I was still struggling to simply stay asleep and in the dream. Just for fun, I tried to change the person to someone else entirely. This sort of weird morphing action took place and the change was successful, but then I woke up completely right afterwards.

I did have a very detailed dream after that point, which I will breifly outline.

It was set in olde-English times and everyone was dressed accordingly. I was taking care of my sisters, I think one was a sick Megan who didn't really look like Megan, and the other was a much younger girl of eight or nine. We were waiting in line through this large mansion, taking a tour through it and waiting for some big suprise at the end. I got this horrible premonition through the middle of the dream and started hustling my sisters through the crowd back outside. I didn't want to scare them so I didn't tell them, but I knew the large mansion was going to be demolished with all of us inside of it. There was a horrible feeling of suspense as we tried to get through the crowd to make it outside. We made it, and we just caught a good place to take cover when the house started blowing apart and crumbling. My sisters were crying and scared and I was trying to cover and protect them as best I could. I told them to hang tight and ran to grab a stray taxi-carriage that had no driver. I knew I was stealing it, but I didn't care-I had to get my sisters to safety.

I remember getting them into the carriage and taking up the drivers' seat and rushing away from the home, but at this point the dream changed into simply me driving the carriage about in old-english areas. I was still running from something, but it wasn't specified at this point. I turned into a very tight alleyway and kept getting nervous about falling off the carriage's drivers' seat because the alley kept turning into rough terrain. First it was train tracks we were navigating over (in an alley way??! hahah). Then, there were stairs, up and down stairs that the horse had to navigate and that the large wheels of the carriage had to hobble over.

I had been talking to the horse to keep it going along, and it had become a sort of pet of mine at this point, despite being stolen at the beginning. We finally got out of the alleyway and I got to get down off the carriage. I started leading the horse by it's bridle and stopped to carress its face next to a shopping cart-kiosk thing. The horse then transformed into a tall black man, that looked suspiciously like the artist Busta-Rhymes. His hair was done up in corn-rows (sp?) but he had little pink hair clips and things like you would see a little three year old girl wearing. He started hitting on me/teasing me and pulling more little hair clips out of buckets on the kiosk, trying to put them in my hair. I was blushing and pushing his hands away, saying I was taken already. My internal commentary at this point began wondering where the hell he came from, and why he just transformed out of a horse.

Then, my alarm went off and I got up to get ready.

Tylenol Cold Nighttime Dream

So It started out with me watching some sort of chick flick where Matthew Broderick and Sarah Jessica Parker were at their wedding, obviously getting married. I started out within the movie, from the viewpoint of Matthew Broderick. Occassionally it would change to a viewpoint of watching it while lying very slovenly on a couch. I had a bowl of some sort of snack - popcorn? m&m's? lying on my stomach that I was casually eating. Matthew and Sarah's wedding ended and then later on in the movie, they got a divorce and SJP was talking to some friend of hers in the movie. She said something like "You see, our relationship could be defined like this situation that would always happen. Every day as he was leaving for work, I would hand him an apple." (vision of her handing him a green apple, him smiling on the television). "And he would take the apple, but he never wanted the apple in the first place. We both knew this, but kept up the charade anyway."

I yelled to my dad in the other room, "Dad, I'm watching this chick flick and I just heard this, tell me if it makes any sense to you? '[repeat of what SJP just said on movie]'"
Dad responds (out of view), "What? Alyson I can't hear you, I'm in the other room."
I shrugged it off and began to trance out to the commercials that were playing on the TV. They were pervasive in my vision, taking up the whole of all I could see, though I knew I was simply watching the television. (Ie: I could not see my nose or hair, it was simply the images from the screen). They were very colorful, but chaotically so. The images looked drawn by a child, scribbled harshly with jagged edges. It wasn't animated, per se, but it looked drawn. Also, the "people" were represented by circular shapes with arms and legs and a face on the circle. The next commercial then evolved from the circular shaped jagged lines and all that to "Mr. Saturn" men much more smoothly drawn - to the point where they looked realistic. There was a little family of them standing together and I said, "Aww cute! a sitcom with Mr. Saturn men!!"

So then I was in a department store just cruisin' looking at all the cool clothes and shopping. Eventually I see Sarah Jessica Parker in the shop and say hello all nonchalant. She and I start talking and she begins flirting with me hardcore. Next thing I know, we're at the same chapel that she and Matthew were in to get married...and she and I are getting married. My internal dialogue, which often can be seperate from my dream providing "commentary" said "Wait, Women can't get married to each other, that's not legal yet in many places...oh well." Besides my internal commentary being mostly apathetic, my dream self was very excited to be getting married to Sarah Jessica Parker.

The memories are fuzzy at this point, but SJP and I had gotten a divorce. I end up at some random place just milling about again. I think it was a horse ranch of some kind. There I met Dakota Fanning and she and I hit it off and we really liked each other. I end up proposing to her at the end of the portion of this dream, and end up being engaged and planning my wedding to Dakota Fanning.

Yeah....wtf...I'm not even Bisexual.